The Lemonade, And the Room of Wonders
by Seal of Darkness
Summary: One-shot. Slight Snape bashing. One bathroom. Many people. They all need to use it at the same time, but the all powerful Snape is guarding the throne! Harry manages to devise a way to bypass the resident wizard pileup in the hallway...


_Ok, this does have some light Snape bashing in it… I just couldn't resist… It also has a devious Harry and a residential pileup. Some of you may find this utterly disgusting, but I thought it was hilarious._

**The Lemonade, And the Room of Wonders**

Sirius rapped on the black wooden door harshly, shouting out for all in Grimmuald Place to hear, "Oy, Snivellus! What are you doing in there, making a dung bomb?! I'll blast one in my pants if you don't hurry up in there!"

Dumbledore, who was just passing by with coffee and lemon drops in hand, stopped to see what was going on. He tapped Sirius on the shoulder, which caused the poor young lad to jump and almost fall backwards.

Dumbledore inquired softly, to avoid making louder noises, "Sirius, is something the matter? Exactly what is going on here?"

Sirius turned around and scowled at the aged man. "That bloody bugger has been in there for almost half an hour now! I'm gonna wet myself if he doesn't finish anytime soon!"

"Why don't you go in the bushes like the good mutt you are," Severus' voice filtered through the door.

Both Dumbledore and Sirius turned to stare at the door for a brief moment before returning their attention to the conversation.

"Is there not another one upstairs?" Dumbledore reasoned quietly and Sirius shook his head sadly. "I'll wait with you until he gets out, and I'll have to have a little chat with him about the morning shifts and taking turns." Sirius nodded his head and leaned against the wall by the door, crossing his legs. "I really have to go," he wined.

Molly Weasley woke up early, just to use the 'room' undisturbed by the other residents of the house, but just as she rushed down, she saw Dumbledore and Sirius hanging outside the door to use the 'room.'

"What's the hold up?"

Dumbledore stepped aside and said, "I'm not in line to use it, I'm only here to have a chat with the gentleman inside when he gets out." Molly nodded her head and got behind Sirius, setting her shampoo and towels down on a nearby in-table. She marched up to the door and rapped on the frame really hard, shouting, "You had better hurry your self up, otherwise I'll poison the late breakfast! You'll never lean yourself over another cauldron again Severus, as long as I'm around to make your life a living hell!"

After about ten minutes, the Weasley family, and husband, raced each other down the stairs and to the 'room,' until they caught sight of Dumbledore, Sirius, and Molly Weasley. "Get in line you lot," Sirius grumbled, shifting his feet and switching legs.

Ten more minutes later…

Tonks was walking down the hallway to make some coffee for herself, but stopped short when she caught sight of the crowd hanging outside the 'room.' She walked up to them, and noticed that Sirius was shifting from foot to foot, Dumbledore was tapping his foot impatiently and stirring the lemon drops in his coffee, Molly was in the process of untangling her hair, Arthur was reading the newspaper in his hands, Ron was also jumping from side to side, Ginny was trying to summon the toothpaste, and the twins were strangling each other with their towels.

"What started this," She began to ask, but Hermione cut her off by stopping directly behind the twins. "Sorry Tonks, but you snooze, you lose. I got in line before you."

"Right…" Tonks pushed through the crowd and walked to the kitchen to get her morning wake-up call.

Harry drudged down the stairs, needing to use the 'room' as well, but stopped when he saw the huge line of people that now included Tonks and Mad-Eye Moody. _"Resident pile up at the only 'room' on the first floor. This looks like its going to be a while. For those of you listeners out there, the alternate routes are the second hallway to the left that leads directly to the kitchen and takes you around the wait. If you're stuck in the traffic, it's going to be at least an hour or two wait for the way to clear up. In the meantime, I think I'll go make some lemonade,"_ Harry thought, walking purposely past the rest of the group and into the kitchen.

After two minutes, Harry walked out of the kitchen, looking extremely relieved and ready to start the morning. He waved silently to his friends, who glared at him as he walked back to the bedrooms to get dressed.

When Harry came back down, the crowd was still lined up outside the 'room,' but this time, they were taking turns to insult Snape and hit against the door. Harry chuckled and said, "You guys do know that you're banging that door to hell and back right?" He broke out into full laughter as Snape finally stepped out of the 'room.'

Harry made his way to the kitchen and got himself some tea when he heard Sirius groan about greasy gits not washing their $h!++y hands after using the 'room' to make dung bombs. Harry stiffened as Snape walked into the kitchen to grab some lemonade. Harry stared at the man as he poured the liquid from the pitcher and into a mug.

They stared at each other for some time until Snape tasted the lemonade. Harry felt his lips betraying him as he watched the man taste the drink. Snape spit the contents out all over the table and Harry asked tightly, "What's wrong, professor Snape?"

Snape glared at the mug and said disgustedly, "This lemonade tastes like piss!"

_Oooohhh! Burn! Muwah ha ha ha ha!_


End file.
